


A Thousand Paper Shurikens

by Graceksjp



Category: Agent Carter (TV), Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: (but also like kinda canon while really not being canon), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canonical Character Death, Family, Kid Fic, Kid Natasha Romanov, Mentions Edwin Jarvis, Mentions Howard Stark, Mentions Sharon Carter, Origami, Red Room (Marvel), kinda almost sorta gets adopted by Cartinelli, mentions Tony Stark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-10
Updated: 2017-07-10
Packaged: 2018-11-30 10:43:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11461947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Graceksjp/pseuds/Graceksjp
Summary: In which Peggy finds a tiny Natasha, Angie attempts to adopt an assassin, Natasha can break into anywhere, theres a whole lot of origami, and family is not about blood.





	A Thousand Paper Shurikens

**Author's Note:**

> Ok a few things first:
> 
> 1) I have never actually watches Agent Carter (oops) but I've seen this pairing pop up a lot and I needed Peggy for this to work so I went with it  
> 2) There's not actually any Red Room. It's a series of Natasha's interactions with Peggy and her family  
> 3) I'm notoriously bad at grammar but I tried. No one else has read this but me so feel free to tell me where I messed up  
> 4) This is like the second thing longer than two pages I've ever written in my life...it could be terrible  
> 5) The canonical character death is Peggy and Angie this fic spans over 60 years  
> 6) If you have just read all that than you're a much better person than I am good on you
> 
> Oh, and just in case you were wondering a Shuriken is a type of Japanese dagger (google it) and i have no idea how they ended up in this story.
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own anything (no matter how much I wish I did)

Natasha does not believe in getting attached to little, unimportant objects the way most people do. She does not have old teddy bears, her high school yearbook, and her grandmother's jewelry stashed away in some cardboard box of things she can never give away. Attachment was trained out of her at a very early age, and she has lived life on the run too many times to have many possessions. And she would tell you this, if you were to ask her, and she would explain the impracticality of such things. But she would do it with an ever so slightly faraway look in her eyes as her she brought to mind the faded edges of an old photograph, two twin smiles, an origami shuriken, and a British accent she could never forget. 

…….

 

…….

 

The girl couldn’t have been any older than ten. She was pale and skinny and had a wild mane of red curls framing her face. Her bright green eyes were wide and seemingly frightened as she stared up at the woman in front of her. She looked like an innocent young girl. Peggy’s gun was unwavering regardless and aimed directly between the girl’s eyes. This might have more to do with the four men lying around the little girl, that Peggy had watched her bring down with alarming ease. The girl moves suddenly, and she is fast-faster than Peggy and faster than she should be-and she is far more skilled than her wide eyed persona would have you believe. Peggy winces internally at the thought of hurting a child, but steels herself with the knowledge that this is no ordinary child. This is a child like the one that stabbed Dum Dum. She is fast and she is skilled, but Peggy has both size and experience to her advantage and manages to slip her arms around her assailant after only a few minutes. She waits till the girl goes limp before she lifts her and heads towards the exit. She walks out of the Red Room facility with a sigh, shifting the child to a more comfortable position. Seriously,  _this_ is why she hates Russia.

 

…….

 

The girl’s name is Natalia, she does not know how old she is, and although she obviously understands English perfectly, she has yet to actually  _speak_ it. Besides her name and a few yeses and nos, she really hasn’t spoken much at all. The only things Peggy really knows about her are that she’s a child assassin with a death glare that-on a scale from one to ten-averages about a three, she’s severely malnourished and covered in bruises, and there’s a very good chance that she’s not 100 percent human. Of course, once Angie shows up these facts fail to matter quite as much.

 

“Hey English you never told me SHIELD was in the business of kidnapping tiny children.” Were the first words out of her mouth when she entered Peggy’s office. 

 

Peggy looked up with a sigh. Angie was leveling her best glare at her from the doorway. “She’s a trained Russian assassin Angie, she’s not an innocent kid.”

 

“She’s a cute Russian assassin is what she is. And she’s, like, six.” Comes the reply as Angie crosses the room to throw herself into a chair. 

 

“Cute or not she is deadly. And she’s not six, she’s got to be at least nine or ten.”

 

“Well, what are you planning to do to her.” Peggy locks eyes with Angie and notes that the other woman looks completely serious. She thinks hard before answering.

 

“We believe that whoever trained her gave her a watered down version of Steve’s super serum. We’re not really sure what it’s made of or how they managed to get it to work, but we do know that such information cannot fall into the wrong hands. She’ll be kept here for further testing and questioning.” Peggy knows it's not what Angie wanted to hear, but it was the truth and she deserved that much.

 

“She’s just a kid you know. I don’t care what those people wanted her to become, right now she’s still just a kid. And she’s been hurt, English. She doesn’t deserve that. That room she’s in now is no better than a jail cell.” 

 

“Well, she is technically a criminal.” That earned her another glare. It was true though.

 

“It’s not like there’s anywhere else for her to go. We can’t trust her alone, not on a base full of weapons and people she’s been taught her whole life are enemies.” Peggy reasoned.

 

“We do live in a mansion you know. Surely, you’re more than capable of keeping an eye on a ten year old.” It’s Peggy’s turn to glare at Angie. That has got to be one of the stupidest ideas she has ever heard. Never mind that  yes _technically_  they do have several unused rooms. Or that yes, she is capable of subduing the child if the need arises. It’s still a terrible idea, and she tries to tell Angie that. However she’s knows she’s lost as Angie prattles on about finding her something better to wear, and how she obviously was in need of a good meal, and whether or not she thought she had ever had American food before. So instead she resignedly prepares herself for a new houseguest.

 

…….

 

As it so happens Natalia hadn’t ever eaten American food. And she clearly had never seen a car before. Or a house. In fact, Peggy had the feeling that she had rarely ever been  _outside_ before. However, she _is_ positive that within minutes of stepping into it, Natalia had already scoped it out and noted all the exits.

 

Dinner is a quiet affair. For Peggy and Natalia that is, Angie talks the entire time. Natalia picks at her food and doesn’t really eat anything. Peggy keeps her hand hovering over her knife, and very purposefully doesn’t give one to Natalia. Angie makes up a bed while Natalia’s in the bathroom. Peggy tries to explain that this isn’t permanent, that Natalia cannot stay here she is an  _assassin._ Angie brushes away her concerns with a careless wave of her hand and a kiss and asks if she has a small nightgown for Natalia to borrow.

 

…….

 

Natalia stays with them for three days. Peggy does not hear her speak a word of English in that entire time. She comes with Peggy for blood draws, and questioning without a fight. She puts up with Howard and the scientists in the labs. She allows Angie to buy her clothes and try to talk to her and even teach her origami, and for the most part is a quiet and obedient child. Peggy knows better than to let her guard down. She checks in on her several times a night. Every time, Natalia meets her gaze with steely eyes. On her fourth night there, Peggy checks in for the sixth time to see Natalia curled into a ball seemingly fast asleep. She has tied a sock around her wrist and attached it to the metal headboard. In the morning, Natalia is gone. In her place, is a neatly stacked and folded pile of linens with a small, red paper Shuriken on top. SHIELD is mad. Peggy is quietly relieved. Howard is annoyed. Angie is heartbroken. She takes the small origami and places it with care on her bedside table. 

 

…….

 

Five months later some food goes missing from their house. In their place sits a small, orange paper Shuriken. Angie is delighted. Peggy is paranoid and doubles their security.

 

…….

 

A little more than a year later, and the intelligence community learns of a new assassin racking up an impressive kill list. Nobody knows much about her except that she is female and has fiery red hair and is well trained. Peggy decides to tell Angie that Natalia is alive and well. 

 

Two weeks later more food and two of the shirts Angie had bought for Natalia goes missing. Another origami shuriken sits in their place.

 

…….

 

Peggy comes face to face with Natalia again over two years later when she comes downstairs one night and finds her sitting on the kitchen counter in the dark. Peggy has a gun in her hand in an instant but she does not point it at the girl. Not yet. Natalia has not aged a day since Peggy last saw her and she wishes all of a sudden that Howard had been able to crack the secret behind the strange blood samples they had acquired from the young girl. Peggy calmly flips the light switch on. Natalia continues her work of stitching up the sluggishly bleeding gash on her left arm. 

 

“It took me awhile to figure out where you kept your first aid kit. It wasn’t in the bathroom.” Her voice is quiet and she speaks English flawlessly. Peggy is in no way surprised by that fact. She has no idea why there is a tiny Russian assassin patching herself up in her kitchen, but she does know that she can’t allow Angie to see her. So she walks over and holds out her hand until the girl places the needle carefully in her palm. She finishes stitching Natalia’s arm with quick efficiency and wraps it carefully. Natalia jumps off the counter and moves towards the door with a soft word of thanks. 

 

“You could stay you know.” And in all honesty Peggy has no clue why she’s staying this. “It’s not yet too late for you to be granted amnesty. We could work something out.” Natalia pauses and reaches to place her hand on the counter. She gives Peggy one long silent look before she slips out the door and into the night. 

 

The next morning Peggy wakes Angie with a kiss and a green paper shuriken. 

 

…….

 

Within the next year and a half Peggy finds three more paper shurikens and more items go missing from their house. Jarvis worries, but Angie simply delights in having a complete rainbow of origami ninja stars. Peggy stares at them and tries to make sense of it. 

 

(She does not succeed.) 

 

…….

 

Angie's career continues to blossom and her and Peggy's relationship does as well. Peggy continues going on missions for SHIELD, but not nearly as many as she did before becoming director. These days she does more paperwork than ass kicking. However, it is on one of her missions to a small town in Italy that she catches a flash of red hair out of the corner of her eye. 

 

Natalia should be almost fifteen; she still looks closer to ten. She's clutching the hand of a tall, dark haired man who is most likely another assassin. Peggy is well aware that remnants of the Red Room still exist. Natalia speaks in easy Italian as if she's been doing it her whole life-maybe she has-and she honest to god  _giggles_ and smiles brightly. Peggy trails her for a couple hours but soon her own mission calls her away. As she unpacks in the safe house with her team that night, she finds a black paper shuriken in her bag. She lays awake the rest of the night wondering when Natalia was ever within even 100 feet of her.

 

…….

 

Five years after Peggy brought a preteen assassin home with her, her and Angie are preparing to make the biggest decision of their lives. But with Angie under contract with people who don't even know she's in a relationship, she definitely can't get pregnant. Peggy on the other hand is doing very little field work that brings her very far from home and she knows that having kids is Angie's biggest dream in life. And so she makes a decision that leads her, nine months later, to a hospital bed screaming and cursing and squeezing the life out of Angie's hand. 

 

Peggy never really expected to be a mother to anything other than a secret government organization, so it was certainly a surprise to realize she now had not one, but two kids. The boy comes out first, and Peggy has never been one to think that newborns were all that cute with their squishy, wet red faces, but the only word that comes to mind when she gazes upon her son is  _beautiful._

  
  


…….

 

Despite him being his godfather, there was no way Peggy was naming her only son after Howard Stark, so she settles on Steven Daniel Carter instead. Peggy signs the birth certificate with tears in her eyes. Beside her, she hears Angie telling Jarvis how Daniel will probably just go by his middle name anyway you know, and she loves her so so much in that moment even as her heart aches for a great man forever lost. 

 

Naming the girl Elizabeth had been a much easier decision. 

 

(Weeks ago Angie had teased the name Natalie if it was a girl. Peggy was pretty sure she was joking, but she stared at the rainbow of origami on the nightstand and couldn't help thinking it was a pretty middle name.) 

 

…….

 

Peggy returned to work almost immediately and even though she was confined to her desk she made sure she was useful. She reads a report of a mission interrupted by a “red headed girl who was strong as hell” and adds it to the growing pile of similar encounters. Natalia was starting to make a name for herself. 

 

…….

 

Peggy was at work the next time Natalia stopped by the house. Angie and the twins were home though. Angie tells her the whole story later about how Natalia had shown up with two baby rattles and the shirts she had taken over the years, and Angie had apparently offered her lunch and _let her hold Elizabeth._ Peggy regretts not telling Angie about the growing kill list following the teenager. As she berates Angie for ever trusting a deadly assassin with their newborn daughter she realizes this was the first time she had ever felt truly afraid of Natalia. 

 

Angie however was adamant that Natalia would never hurt the twins or herself, and not only does she give the little rattles to the babies, but she also hangs the two new, large paper shurikens on their mobiles. 

 

…….

 

Peggy had been reluctant to go on this mission. She didn't take any out of country missions any more because of the twins. However, as she stared at the small red headed form across from her she's suddenly very glad she said yes. Peggy might be a little out of practice in hand to hand but she still manages to pin Natalia long enough for the girl to recognize her before letting her scramble to her feet. 

 

“So. You're the Black Widow now.” It wasn't a question. Peggy already knew the answer, she'd been keeping track for months. Frankly she found the moniker disgusting, seeing as Natalia still barely looked old enough to be entering high school. 

 

“My offer still stands Natalia. You don't have to do this.”

 

Natalia's only answer was a glare. A loud crash and several gunshots pulled both their attention to the outside. A sharp voice shouted a command in Russian. Natalia and Peggy both drew their guns at the same time. Natalie gave her a small smile. 

 

“Tell Angie and the twins I say hello.” A gunshot rings out and Peggy ducks instinctively. When she glances up Natalia is gone and there is a bullet hole in the wall several feet away from where she was standing. Peggy considers that for a moment. Natalia had just blatantly disobeyed an order to kill her, but Peggy could not figure out why. As she turned and tucked her gun away, stepping carefully around the many bodies littering the floor, she slipped her hand into her pocket and ran her fingers over the paper soft edge of the shuriken she found there. 

 

…….

 

The twins get bigger every day. Peggy has brought them to work sometimes and delights in making Howard change their diapers. Angie decided to shift back to Broadway and theatre. Hollywood will miss her, but she wants to be closer to home. Stage rehearsals are not an ideal place for babies but at least the people there actually know what a baby is, unlike her agents who look at the two of them as if they're highly dangerous explosives. 

 

(On some days, Peggy would be inclined to agree with them.) 

 

…….

 

Elizabeth walks before her brother, and her first word is “shiny” as she points eagerly at Peggy's gun gleaming in the light. Daniel soaks things up like a sponge and his first word is “car”. The fact that neither of them said anything remotely close to “mom” disappoints Angie, but the fact that Daniel's next word resembled “engine” delights Howard, who promptly decides Daniel should take after his godfather and become an engineer. The twins are walking and talking and it has been months without a report on the Black Widow. Peggy shouldn't be worried, this is a good thing. 

 

(But Peggy is worried, so she kisses her daughter on the forehead and prays somewhere out there, a small Russian assassin is still alive.)

 

…….

 

On their second birthday the twins receive an anonymous gift of two identical stuffed spiders that are laid carefully in their beds and are there when they wake up in the morning. There's food missing from the kitchen, and a recent photo of Angie and the twins seems to be absent as well. Angie laments the lack of origami. 

 

Three days later Peggy receives a report that the Black Widow was spotted again for the first time in months.

 

…….

 

When the twins are three and a half, Peggy jerks awake in the middle of the night and tries to figure out what woke her. Nothing seems wrong, but she pads silently down the hall to the twins room just to be sure. She has her gun pointed at the figure standing there well before the moonlight can ignite the flames of red hair atop the figures head. 

 

“Step away from them.” She orders calmly, her gun still pointed at Natalia's head. The girl just looks at her and then glances away, back down at Elizabeth sleeping calmly in her toddler bed. Natalia fingers the soft fur of the stuffed spider clasped in the young girl's hands. 

 

“She's beautiful.” The words come out in a whisper so faint Peggy has to strain to hear them. 

 

“What are you doing here, Natalia?” Peggy demands. Her gun is still pointed at the girl's head. Peggy just hopes that Angie won't wake up. Natalia looks at her with green eyes that for once aren't steely and strong, instead they seem confused as if Natalia doesn't understand the question. 

 

“I'm not....I'm not sure. I….” She pauses here and glances away, as if thinking desperately for an answer that might make sense. 

 

“I can't remember things. A lot of things. Like when my birthday is or who my parents are or whether or not I actually know ballet. They like it that way. Every mission we start out with a clean slate, and they write down whatever story best fits. Yet….no matter what they did, I could never forget you.” Here Natalia locks eyes with Peggy and she looks sure of herself for the first time that night. Peggy on the other hand has never felt so lost. She lowers her gun slowly, and tucks it away. 

 

“My offer still stands Natalia. You can walk away. You don't have to work for the KGB.” Peggy knows her efforts are probably futile, but she can't help but hope that this will be the time that Natalia accepts. “It would make Angie really happy.” 

 

Natalia's eyes flick toward the hallway, where she knows Angie is asleep just a few doors down. For a second, Peggy thinks she might say yes, but then her face goes blank and she gives a vigorous shake of her head. 

 

“It's not that simple.” She responds. On the bed beside her, Elizabeth begins to stir, her eyes blinking open just for a second. Natalia freezes before swiftly backing away, and it's the first time Peggy has seen her rattled. Peggy glances back down at her daughter and makes to move towards her. By the time she reaches her bedside, Natalia is gone. Peggy shushes her daughter back to sleep and stares at the shuriken she left in her wake. 

 

(Elizabeth will have dreams of a beautiful redhead for the next couple years. She tells her mothers she has a guardian angel, and Peggy's smile doesn't quite reach her eyes.)

 

…….

 

The twins are just past four when Elizabeth finds them. There's twelve in total. Elizabeth points to the large pink one and declares that it's hers. Peggy watches her daughter twirl the paper shuriken in her hands and remembers how it hung over the girl's bed for almost two years. She tells the twins that they're origami stars and watches as they run around laughing and throwing them at each other. 

 

(She does not tell them what a real shuriken is, nor does she tell them who made them in the first place.)

 

…….

 

Two months after Elizabeth tapes her pink shuriken to the side of her bed, she comes running into the kitchen clutching one in her hands.

 

“Look, mama I found one! And it's realllllly pretty.” She holds the star aloft so Peggy can see. It's soft purple and covered in flowers. It's the first patterned one she's seen. Peggy congratulates her daughter, who runs off to show a delighted Angie, and buys a brand new house security set the very next day. 

 

(A week later Daniel shows up with a blue one covered in boats, anyway.)

 

…….

 

Peggy's the handler for a simple intel mission a year later, when the Black Widow decides to crash the party. She goes to help her team out, but they're all already unconscious when she gets there. Peggy throws herself at the lithe form standing above them. Natalia has always been much faster than Peggy, and although she can easily manage to hold her own against most assailants, Natalia's unnaturally strong and in peak physical condition. She throws Peggy to the ground and aims a gun at her head.

 

“Do it.” Peggy challenges. “But know that any chance of amnesty will die with me.” Natalia just laughs. 

 

“Who said I wanted any of you dead?” She answers with a smirk. “If I did, your team wouldn't be enjoying a power nap over there, they'd already be halfway to hell.” Natalia should be legal drinking age by now, but she looks about fourteen to Peggy's eyes and it's still disconcerting seeing her with a gun. She keeps said gun steady as she walks forward and drops a file at Peggy's feet. Then she turns and, without another glance, walks away. 

 

Peggy drags the file toward her. In the top right corner a paper clip holds on to a small, golden shuriken. When her team wakes up she informs them they have all the intel they require, and they go home early to brag about surviving an encounter with the Black Widow. 

 

(Peggy goes home early to hand Angie a paper shuriken. Angie declares it's a gold star for good behavior. Peggy doesn't quite disagree.)

 

…….

 

On the kids’ sixth birthday, Angie finds a birthday present sitting on their front porch. Peggy thinks it's a bomb. Angie sees the swirl patterned shuriken hanging from the tag and opens it anyway. Inside sits  _Paper Folding Fun,_ a book on origami-and several squares of paper. Angie helps teach Elizabeth how to make a crane. Daniels first success is a boat.

 

On the Fourth of July, Elizabeth wakes up to find one of her cranes missing, and a red white and blue striped shuriken in its place. That night Angie tells the twins a tale about a young Russian girl and an origami lesson. Elizabeth decides Natalia must be the guardian angel from her dreams and searches the whole house for more shurikens. 

 

…….

 

The twins start first grade that same fall. Angie books a small job with director she knows back in LA, who convinces her to guest star in an episode of his new television show. Peggy agrees to fly out to a SHIELD base across the country to look over some intriguing reports. This leaves the nanny they've hired as the only one home that day, just three weeks after the twins entered first grade, when Peggy gets a call that there's been a shooting at their elementary school. Both women rush home as fast as possible with Peggy making frantic calls to SHIELD, demanding to know if this was a direct attack on her children. It can't be a coincidence that both Angie and Peggy were hundreds of miles away when this happened. 

 

They pull in at the same time and together, rush into the house. The door slams open and they both freeze. Sitting on the living room floor, calmly folding origami, are their two perfectly unharmed children and a certain red headed Russian. Elizabeth glances up with a smile. 

 

“Look mama, I'm making sword!” Indeed the three children seemed to be making elaborate paper swords. Natalia still hadn't looked at them. The young teens clothes were bloody and there was a gun lying on the coffee table. 

 

Angie was the first to recover, rushing over and taking Elizabeth into her arms. She gave Daniel a kiss on the head and checked them head to toe for injuries. Peggy still hadn't taken her eyes off of Natalia. 

 

“I heard about it by chance. I’m not sure if it was specifically aimed at you or not. They were young; it’ll look like suicide. The twins were never there. They had a sick day. Oh, and your nanny is fine.” Natalia rattles off in a rush, before turning to look at woman still standing in the doorway. Beside her Angie is thanking her and saying something else, but Natalia only has eyes for Peggy. 

 

“Thank you.” Peggy finally manages to force out, because her daughter is currently babbling on about how Natalia saved their lives (“See mama she _is_ my guardian angel-she guardeds me from the baddies!”) and she will play nice for her children. 

 

Natalia showers, accepts some clean clothes, and stays for dinner. Angie offers her the room that she stayed in the very first time she came to the house. The only difference from those few nights to now, is the row of paper shurikens on the dresser top. 

 

…….

 

Peggy expects Natalia to slip out that first night. She surprises them all by joining them for breakfast the next morning. Peggy and Angie have a long and heated argument about letting the known killer play house with their children, but like most of their arguments, Angie wins and Natalia stays. 

 

The kids’ school is shut down temporarily, so to the twins delight the have all day to spend playing with their new friend. Natalia for her part is surprisingly comfortable around children. If Peggy didn’t know she was an infamous assassin, she’d think Natalia would make a really good babysitter. The twins certainly love her. 

 

They finish their origami swords and run around playing “ninja” with the twins teaming up against Natalia. For the most part Peggy pays them little attention, and instead works on paperwork while watching Natalia out of the corner of her eye. Angie is with them, and she might not trust the girl, but she knows Natalia won’t hurt them. She’s had plenty of opportunities to do so, and she never has. Natalia might have only spent three days with them, but they were the only people in her world that had ever been kind to her. Peggy supposes that made quite the impact on the young girl. 

 

When Natalia tries to teach the kids handstands and cartwheels, Peggy pays them no mind. When Natalia shows them how to adjust their grips on the paper sword handles, Peggy still pays them no mind. When Natalia starts telling them the proper way to punch, Peggy decides that’s probably far enough. 

 

(Natalia leaves a week later and the twins not only know the proper way to punch, but they also know to always land and roll, have memorized most of the pressure points on a human body that can instantly disable someone, and are begging her for proper martial arts classes. Peggy reevaluates Natalia’s babysitting skills.) 

 

…….

 

Elizabeth doesn’t shut up about Natalia for months. She’s always asking when she’ll be back and Peggy barely managed to convince her Natalia was not something she could talk about with her friends. For Christmas that year Elizabeth asks for gymnastic classes-which Peggy decides is at least better than the kung fu classes she originally wanted. Daniel asks for a “real sword”. Angie promises them that Natalia will come back one day. Peggy glares at all of them and regrets ever going to Russia. 

 

…….

 

The Black Widow continues to expand her kill list and begins going after higher profile targets. She is joined by the elusive assassin known as the Winter Soldier. At home, the twins turn eight and Elizabeth still searches the house every day for an origami shuriken.

 

(Peggy can’t decide what she wants more- for Elizabeth to find one, or not.)

 

…….

 

It’s the summer after the twins tenth birthday when one finally shows up. It’s small, half green half blue, and sits atop a small note that simply says “unfold”. Peggy takes the shuriken inside and very carefully unfolds it till she’s left with two halves of a square. A small series of numbers is written on the inside of one of the folded pieces. 

 

Two days later finds Peggy’s team standing in a burning building and trying desperately to figure out the code to unlock crucial files for an ongoing mission. They only have two chances before the lock self destructs and destroys all the files. Peggy takes a deep breath and gives them the numbers Natalia left her.

 

…….

 

The twins start sixth grade in two weeks when Peggy and Angie agree to take them down south to one of Howard Stark’s private lake houses. It’s one of the first vacations Peggy has taken in a long time. Three days into the trip Peggy sends Angie out for a few groceries. She comes home with a very familiar assassin. 

 

The twins are ecstatic that Natalia is there, though Peggy has no idea how to explain the fact that the seemingly fifteen year old they met when they were six, seems barely a year older. She also apparently died her famous red hair to blonde. Natalia refuses to say whether or not she’s on a mission and instead heads outside to play with the kids while Peggy yells at Angie. 

 

Natalia ends up staying the entire rest of the vacation. She critics Elizabeth’s tumbling skills and listens to Daniel explain his attempt of making a robot out of the scraps he found in Howard’s workshop (even though Peggy’s pretty sure she had locked that door). She watches Peggy struggle through a thank you for the help on Peggy’s mission. She also finally teaches Elizabeth to fold her own shuriken. Elizabeth had been refusing to learn for years unless Natalia was the one to teach her. In return, Elizabeth taught Natalia how to play cards and draw a pony. By the end of the vacation both twins could hold their breath for three minutes, karate chop a board in half, and walk across a tightrope stretched between two trees. Natalia had beaten them all in poker fifteen times. 

 

Natalia disappears in the middle of the night the day before they were all set to go home. She leaves behind a paper shuriken for each of the four of them, and she takes with her the pony drawing Elizabeth had made. Peggy had spent the entire vacation worried that Russians were going to break into their house and kill them all, but she is oddly disappointed to see the girl go. 

 

…….

 

Natalia stops by their house six more times within the next few years. Most of these are a quick stop by and don’t last more than an hour, but a couple have her staying the whole day before sneaking out at night like always. A pile of linens and a paper throwing star are the only evidence of her stay. 

 

One of those times Angie snaps a photo of Peggy, the twins, and Natalia in the backyard. She puts it in a small frame and places it on her bedside. Several times over the years Peggy will catch her staring at it. 

 

Each time Natalia comes over Peggy tells Angie how much of a risk this is, how dangerous she is, and how she can’t keep coming here.

 

(Yet each time Natalia comes over, Peggy asks her to stay.)

 

…….

 

The twins are in high school when Natalia shows up for more than just a day again. It’s November and already quite cold out when she turns up at their door in nothing but a bloody, too big t-shirt with makeup running down her face and her feet bare. It’s the first time she’s asked to come in, instead of just appearing inside the house. Peggy takes her to the bathroom where she stitches up her bullet wound and waits for the girl to talk. 

 

Natalia declares herself a free agent at 9:37pm November 18, 1973. She passes out from blood loss two minutes later.

 

…….

 

Peggy get the whole story out of Natalia in bits in pieces. How she was tired of not remembering, tired of killing, and tired of pretending. It’s only when Natalia wakes up crying, gasping for air, and tugging on the wrist she had tied to her bedpost that Peggy finds out the true reason for her defection. 

 

It’s not like Peggy hadn’t known. They didn’t give the girl the name ‘Black Widow’ for nothing. She knew what the Russians were making Natalia do on her missions; it made her sick. Even if Natalia was technically in her early thirties, she looked no older than Peggy’s own daughter and to imagine her with the type of target the Black Widow typically went after made her stomach curl. So Peggy did what she would do if Natalia was Elizabeth. She untied Natalia’s wrist and pulled the crying girl into a hug. 

 

(It wasn’t till they’d been sitting like that for hours and Natalia had fallen asleep again that Peggy realized it was perhaps the first time the girl had ever been comforted. Peggy was alarmed by the fierce protective tug she felt after finishing that thought.) 

 

…….

 

Natalia stayed with them for a few weeks. Seeing as she still could not remember her real birthday, Elizabeth decided to give her one. On November 22nd, Elizabeth came home from school with a single red velvet cupcake. She thrust said baked treat at Natalia, said “Happy Birthday” and continued towards her room. Natalia stared at the cupcake like it was the most precious thing in the world and ever so slowly took a bite. 

 

That evening they celebrate for real, just the five of them, and Peggy’s never seen Natalia smile quite like that. She’s begun putting together the necessary paperwork at SHIELD to bring Natalia in. No one knows yet, but she thinks that maybe, just maybe this will work out.

 

(Four days later she will watch a string of Russian words turn Natalia’s face blank and thinks that for all the times for her to be wrong, this has got to be the worst one.)

 

…….

 

Peggy doesn’t hear from Natalia for several years. She would be more worried if the Black Widow hadn’t shown up again after two.

 

Peggy watches her children grow up and go to college. Daniel decides to intern for Stark, who has his own little boy now. Tony is brilliant and Peggy is more than proud to be his godmother. Peggy is less proud of the man she is watching his father become, though. Howard has been acting less and less like the Howard she knew and loved for years now. His desperate searches for Captain America have turned a once great man into a terrible excuse for a father. Peggy watches Tony’s desperate attempts to make his dad pay attention to him, and thinks it's about time she hit Howard in the face again.

 

…….

 

It’s a decade later and Elizabeth is getting married when Peggy finds another paper shuriken. It’s sitting innocently in her chair right before the wedding begins. She searches the whole area, but can’t find a single sign of the maker. She flips the shuriken over and written carefully on the back in small print are the words, “They never could make me forget you.”

 

(Elizabeth cries when she sees it. She cries even harder when one of her wedding presents comes with two more small shurikens and a note to give one to Daniel.)

 

…….

 

It’s a couple years later and Peggy is about to become a grandmother when Pierce tells her the Black Widow-whom he and the rest of SHIELD continue to believe is more than one person-has defected from the KGB. Peggy confirms this when said assassin sits down next to her at her daughter’s baby shower. 

 

“I burned the place to the ground. No survivors. I’m out. This time for good.” Peggy looks over at the girl beside her. If Peggy didn’t know any better she’d say she’s not even old enough to drink. But Peggy does know better, so she pours her some champagne and lifts her glass.

 

“Cheers.”

 

…….

 

Natalia lives a perfectly normal life for a few years. She’s there in the hospital when Elizabeth gives birth to a healthy baby girl. She holds her in her arms like she’s made of glass and freezes in shock when Elizabeth declares the baby’s name as Natalie. 

 

(Natalie will grow up hearing stories about origami stars, take Ninjutsu as a teen just to learn to throw a real one, and join the CIA fresh out of college. In 2012 she stares at her TV, remembers a flash of red hair, and thinks her mother’s stories might actually be true.)

 

She’s there when Daniel quits working for Stark and takes him out for drinks. She places an extra glass in his hand and shoves him in the direction of the woman sitting by herself three seats over. 

 

(Natalia will attend a wedding two years later, turn to Peggy and say, “I told you so, pay up.” To this day Daniel has no clue what Natalia meant by that remark.)

 

Natalia meets a teenaged Tony Stark-who is ten times too smart for his own good and teaches Natalia how to take apart a computer ten minutes after they meet. She meets Howard for the first time since she was ten and promptly punches him in the face. 

 

(Many years later a grown Tony Stark will stare Natasha Romanoff in the eyes and not remember any of this. In 2012 aliens fall out of the sky and Natalia/Natalie/Natasha moves in with him and gives him an origami ring in arc reactor blue. It takes him 30 seconds total to realize it transforms into a pinwheel like star.)

 

Natalia meets a tiny Sharon Carter when the blonde is barely tall enough to reach her waist. She watches the girl try and karate kick her father, declares she’s a ‘real Carter’, and quickly becomes the toddler’s idol. She gives the small girl an origami ninja star with eight points. Peggy had only ever received ones with four.

 

(Sharon grows up to join SHIELD and she never realizes that the famous Strike Team Delta agent ‘The Black Widow’ is the same Natalia she met all those years ago. Natasha will pass by her on a trip to see her Aunt Peggy one day, and give her an eight pointed origami star.)

 

…….

 

Peggy is holding her grandson and listening to a six year old Natalie explain why Aurora is a better princess than Snow White, when she gets a call telling her the Black Widow has popped up again in Europe. Peggy might not be the Director anymore, but Fury knows Peggy knows the Black Widow case better than anyone. 

 

(They have no idea) 

 

…….

  
  


Natalia decides that domestic life is not for her and starts taking out former Red Room affiliates all across the world. The Black Widow gets back on SHIELD’s radar.

 

Natalia continues to seek out those who have wronged her for several years. One day she will break into a European SHIELD base for supplies and find an arrow pointed at her heart. Natalia looks down the arrow at piercing grey eyes and allows Hawkeye to drag her back to the States. She joins SHIELD under Director Fury’s watch and signs her name, Natasha.

 

…….

 

Natasha Romanoff will quickly become a legend of SHIELD. She breaks every record in combat, weaponry, and espionage skills and rises through the levels faster than any other agent before her. She’ll team up with a man named Clint and somehow become his best friend. She’ll meet another legend by the name of Phil Coulson, and she’ll stare at a picture of SHIELD’s founder and pretend like she’s never heard of a “Peggy Carter”. 

 

The next day said founder will visit the base and find a small origami shuriken tucked into the bottom of the picture frame. Peggy will pluck it out with a smile and wonder when she began to think of Natasha as family.

 

(Peggy has a feeling it was many, many years ago.)

 

…….

 

Strike Team Delta is the best duo SHIELD has ever seen. There’s no mission they can’t complete. Angie was beyond proud when she heard that Natasha had joined SHIELD. 

 

Every year on November 22nd, Natasha meets up with Angie and Peggy and they celebrate with red velvet cupcakes. Natasha stays in touch with Elizabeth and Daniel and watches Natalie grow into a strong young woman, but she hasn’t seen any of them since they moved across the country. She pops in to scare the newbie SHIELD recruits, catches sight of Sharon Carter standing in the back, and smiles. She completes more missions, celebrates with Barton and Coulson, watches Clint drive Fury crazy, and thinks her life is as close to perfect as someone like her could possibly achieve. 

 

Five months later Angie Martinelli, actress extraordinaire, dies.

 

…….

 

The funeral is private. Angie might have been well known, but Peggy wants only close friends and family there. Natasha does not show up till the very end. She hugs Daniel, holds Elizabeth as she cries, introduces herself as Natasha to those she has not yet met (or those who do not recognize her), and turns to Peggy. 

 

Peggy holds a small package in her hands, which she thrusts into Natasha’s as soon as she gets close enough. 

 

“She would want you to have that. She always believed in you, you know. Ever since that very first night, she believed in you. She was never more proud than when I told her you had joined SHIELD. Like a proud mom.” Natasha’s head jerks up at that, eyes wide and disbelieving. Peggy just smiles sadly.

 

“Oh, don’t give me that look. To Angie you were always family. Same for Elizabeth, and Daniel.” Here Peggy pauses and takes a breath before continuing, “And me. I look back on it, that day I brought you home for dinner. Angie was talking a mile a minute and I was thinking of all the ways it was a terrible idea. I almost missed it, but now I can’t forget it. She told me ‘You know English, I’ve always wanted a daughter.’” 

 

Natasha stares at Peggy and tries to remember how to breathe. 

 

“I thought she was crazy.  _Child assassin_ I told her. She could kill us both in our sleep. But she was adamant that you could change. You ran away three days afterwards and I thought ‘that’s it, I was right.’ But then you kept coming back.” Peggy laughed softly.

 

“I actually asked myself not that long ago when a crazy, never aging, ex-Russian assassin became like another daughter to me. I couldn’t really pinpoint it.” Peggy puts her hand into her pocket and pulls out a small paper shuriken. “I think it was the first time I ever found one of these.” 

 

Natasha smiles. “I left that first one because I knew I couldn’t bring it with me. The Red Room doesn’t believe in possessions. Or attachments.” Peggy nods and gives the small star a spin between her fingertips. 

 

“Why keep making them then? You told me why you kept coming back, but why go out of your way to leave little paper weapons behind every time?” Peggy questions. It’s an answer she’s been craving for years. Natasha contemplates for a moment before replying.

 

“They made us forget things. And I never really forgot you, but I sometimes couldn’t remember your name, or Angie’s or the twins. All we had was muscle memory. They needed us to still be able to fight and shoot after all. My hands remembered how to make the shuriken, and my mind would soon fill in the blanks. 

 

“The first time they made me forget you, I only remembered an English accent. I found a stack of old files and spent the next two hours obsessively making tiny shurikens. By the time all the paper was gone, I had remembered everything.” 

 

Natasha ran her hands over and over the edges of the package. She refuses to meet Peggy’s gaze. She doesn’t move until she feels the older woman carefully wrap her arms around Natasha, at which point she freezes in shock. After just a few seconds, she returns the hug.

 

…….

 

It takes Natasha three days to open the package. Inside, sits the small framed photograph Angie took years ago of the twins, Peggy, and Natasha herself back when the twins were kids. Natasha holds the picture to her chest and cries for the first time in years.

 

…….

 

Peggy Carter has just turned 91 when she watches aliens fall from the sky. She sits in her nursing home and watches as one of the few people in this world she calls family fights a battle they cannot hope to win. She watches as someone else she once loved and thought lost, joins her. And she’s still watching when another one of the most important people in her life, flies a nuke through a portal in the sky in what he has to know is a one way trip. Peggy has never been more frightened in all her long, long life. 

 

(Later Natasha will visit her, and Peggy might be too old to slap her these days but that doesn’t mean she’s too old to chew her out for a good twenty minutes. Of all the terrible ideas…)

…….

 

Natasha joins a superhero team. She moves in with a narcissistic billionaire she met when he was thirteen, a god, a super soldier whose first love is kind of like her mom, her best friend who almost killed her, and a scientist whose anger management issues need serious work. It is a terrible idea.

 

However, some of the terrible ideas in Natasha’s life gave her a family. 

 

(A year later and Natasha is starting to think this one won’t be any different.)

…….

Natasha visits Peggy whenever she has the chance. She sits by her bedside, holds her small withered hands, and tells her stories about superheroes. 

(Peggy will call her Natalia and not remember any of it. No matter what time period her mind is in though, Peggy always welcomes Natasha’s company.)

 

 

…….

 

SHIELD falls apart, and Natasha’s life does the same. 

 

She tells Steve to call Sharon and wonders how long it will take him to figure it out. She gives him the file on the Winter Soldier and tries to piece together her own memories of a silver arm and an English accent over Russian words. She runs away to figure things out and doesn't tell her team where she’s going. 

 

(Two days later Elizabeth wakes up to find a paper shuriken on her pillow and an Avenger in her kitchen.)

 

…….

 

Natasha does indeed make new covers. She comes back to the Avengers to search for Loki’s scepter. She attends a party and flirts with Bruce and attempts to kill a robot. 

 

(Sokovia is a disaster. Natasha watches the clouds move below her and thinks this might finally be it. Instead they create life, blow up a city, recruit a witch, and head home.)

 

Natasha follows Steve to the new Avengers facility and builds a new team. She trains hard and finds purpose in teaching the new recruits. She pieces her life back together and thinks she’s finally doing something good again.

 

(It takes a year and a single phone call to tear it all apart.)

 

…….

 

Margaret Elizabeth Carter dies on June 19th, 2016. The sun is shining and it’s a perfect summer day-because it never actually rains on sad days like the movies would make you believe. Natasha does not attend the funeral. Elizabeth and Daniel and all the rest of the family is there. Steve is there. So is Tony, and Sharon. But Natasha cannot bring herself to go. Instead, she sits in her room and stares at a picture of a family she could never forget. 

 

…….

 

Steve mourns his loss like a normal person. He cries and he tells stories and he begins to move on. Natasha watches all of it with an impassive face, and she never sheds a tear. It’s not till Steve brings home a wooden box filled with paper shurikens that she makes up her mind.

 

She follows Steve out on the balcony one evening and sits beside him as he breaks down and talks. Steve tells her the story of an amazing woman who he loved with all his heart. He needs to say it, all of it. Natasha does not interrupt till the end when Steve stumbles a bit and she simply replies, “I know.”

 

She steels herself, takes a breath, and says, “Her and Angie-the woman she fell in love with-and their kids, they….they were the closest thing I ever had to a family.”

 

…….

 

Natasha does not believe in getting attached to little, unimportant objects the way most people do. However, in the back of her closet in the safest building in the world, there sits a box. It’s a small box, only big enough to hold a few things: a paper crane that’s falling apart, a picture of a pair of twins and their mother, a laminated child’s drawing of a pony, and an old framed photo of her family with a small paper shuriken tucked into the corner. 

 

Natasha does not believe in getting attached, but every year on November 22nd, without fail, she buys herself a red velvet cupcake and eats it with a smile. 

**Author's Note:**

> So much of this was probably inaccurate but whatevs (if it bothers you lemme know)
> 
> I'm pretty sure Daniel is like an actual character but Steven Daniel sounded really good together so I used it anyway. Elizabeth is Peggy's middle name.
> 
> Natasha's aging is pretty non linear I kinda just made her whatever age fit best for the scene (oops?)
> 
> I have no idea if paper can last 60 years but heres hoping


End file.
